


When the Only Way Out Is to Fall

by samamandriel



Category: Spider-Man (Video Game 2018), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Character Death, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, i love this peter hes my boo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-14 01:50:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17499296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samamandriel/pseuds/samamandriel
Summary: Sometimes you've got to crawl through a woman's window in the middle of a pandemic to feel alright.(Spoilers for Spider-Man PS4!!)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got this idea and started this fic before I finished the game, before I got to the part after Osborne's penthouse where they basically had this conversation. I still liked it and wanted to finish though, so I did.

_Tok tok._

_……_

_Tok tok._

 

It took a moment for the noise to register to Mary Jane, in her stupor of one part no-time-to-sleep-I’ve-got-write, one part the-world-is-going-to-hell, and just one more part of something not quite describable (or at least one that she didn’t _want_ to describe).

She shook her head, took a breath, and got up to trace the noise. Easy enough; her living room window. There, staring back at her as she pulled back the curtains, were those two big, white eyes she had become so accustomed to.

With a heavy sigh, MJ reluctantly opened the window. “Peter…”

“I know,” he started, “I know. I know you don’t want to see me, and I wanted to respect that, but I–I needed someone to talk to, and you’ve been with me through this whole ordeal.”

She stood there for a long, silent moment, considering her options. Or, at least, she tried to. She knew she wasn’t going to say _no._

“Fine, yeah, of course,” she finally replied. “Come on.”

With a thank you, he crawled in through her window, taking his mask off as he sat down on her couch with a heavy slump. “I think I really messed up this time, Mary Jane,” he started, getting right to the point. “Jameson is right, this is all my fault. If I had made sure Li got to the raft, or _noticed_ that something had changed with Doctor Octavius, I could have stopped this. Now the town is in chaos, getting worse by the minute, and–”

“Peter!” MJ sat next to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Pete. Hey, look at me.”

Peter, who up until now had his face in his hands, reluctantly moved to meet her eyes. He looked exhausted.

“Hi.” She gave what she hoped was a comforting smile. “Now, I want you to listen to me, okay? _None_ of this is your fault. If you weren’t out there being Spider-Man, who knows how much worse things would be. And _yes_ , Peter, this would still be happening, with or without you.” This wasn’t the first time the topic had come up, so she knew to nip it in the bud before it became a spiral.

Sighing, he lay his head on the back of the couch. “I don’t know, MJ. I stopped at the lab today, and I should have known. Doctor Octavius lied right to me, and I never even questioned it. The signs were _right there._ I could have done something.”

So much for stopping a spiral. "Okay then, Pete. Sure. Say you could have. That still leaves Li. Nothing says the exact same thing wouldn't be happening. You can't see the future, there's no way you can stop everyone."

With yet another heavy sigh (and who could blame him?), Peter looked back to her. Even with what felt like the weight of the world on his shoulders, being around Mary Jane Watson always helped him feel grounded, even if just a small amount, even if just for a short while. “Yeah. Maybe.”

“You’re going to make this right, Pete, I know it. You always do. I’m here if you need me.”

The long moment that followed, as the two looked at each other, was heavy with things left unsaid, things left undone.

“I should go,” he said eventually. “I need to be out there.”

Mary Jane nodded, having been shaken out of her thoughts twice now. “Be safe out there.”

As Pete put his mask back on and went to open her window, he looked back at her, for what he hoped wouldn’t be the last time. “I always am. See you soon, MJ.”

“I’ll see you soon, Spider-Man.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter Parker and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special shout-out to Into the Spider-Verse for giving me #confirmed Jewish Peter Parker, and to @ShippingEverything for being very enthusiastic in their opinion that Pete and MJ should go to the roof instead of an empty office.

It broke her heart to hear him cry. As she sat against the railing outside of May Parker’s office, her legs pulled up to her chest, she felt utterly useless to help. Of course, sometimes all you can do is be there. Sometimes, there’s nothing you can do. However, that was never going to be enough reason for Mary Jane Watson to stop trying.

At some point, she realized it had become quieter in the room, and took the chance to peak in on him.

Peter was still on the floor, with his head on the medical bed, but he seemed to have calmed down, or perhaps just ran out of steam.

With a soft sigh, MJ kneeled on the floor next to him, wrapped her arms around his middle. “Go change, Pete. I’ll get the doctor.”

Taking a deep breath, Pete nodded against the bed. “Yeah.” His voice was tired, quiet. He sat back on his heels, rubbed at his eyes.

Mary Jane rubbed his back as he put his mask back on, and then he was gone, leaving her to inform Dr. Michaels of what had happened.

 

Peter hadn’t sat shiva since Uncle Ben, almost a decade ago. Back then, back when he was more naive, he used to think that he wouldn’t  have to do it again until his 50s, when Aunt May was 100. Of course, people didn’t work like that; life didn’t work like that. It was a nice thought at the time, at least.

He was shaken from his thoughts by another  _ “I’m so sorry for your loss.”  _ It was appreciated, of course, but at the moment he didn’t want the attention. He had gotten so used to, for lack of a better term, swinging away his problems, that if felt nearly suffocating to sit still for so long.

Mary Jane had been with him since the funeral, and was about the only person he didn’t mind being around at the moment. She hadn’t left his side, and her hand hadn’t left his, either. She didn’t say anything, didn’t know what to say, even if she had spoken up.

The shiva, of course, took place in the upper recreation area of the FEAST center, so that those who were unable to go to the funeral could easily pay their respects, with the counselling office open right downstairs. Miles had stopped by for a while, but with his own father’s death still so recent, he had needed a break from the atmosphere.

MJ squeezed his hand. “How are you doing?”

Peter considered lying, not wanting to burden her, but eventually decided against it. He was tired. “Bad.”

“Do you want to take a break somewhere else?”

“Please.”

With a nod, she stood up, leading him to the stairs that would take them to the roof. (She almost led him to May’s or to Martin Li’s office, but, while it would have been quiet, it also would have been, well, stupid, given the circumstances.)

The weather was as gloomy outside as the mood inside, but the damp breeze felt nice, and Peter felt like he could almost breathe again as he stood against the railing, looking out at the city below them.

“Thanks for being with me today, MJ. It means a lot.”

“Of course, Pete,” she replied, squeezing his shoulder. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. We’re partners, remember?”

He looked at her. Partners. Here she was, at his aunt’s shiva, making sure he was okay, taking him aside when he wasn’t. There were a lot of feelings going through his mind, almost drowning him at times, but one very clear thought was that he had never stopped loving her.

All he could think of to do to show any of this was to wrap his arms around her, to hold her tight until the world around them went away, so that’s what he did. His eyes began to prickle with tears. “It’s not  _ fair…” _

MJ whispered a soft “Oh, Pete…” as she rubbed his back. “I know. I’m so sorry.”

They stood there together as Peter finally let himself cry again, his face buried against Mary Jane’s shoulder.

 

Peter pulled away, eventually, once he had calmed down. A sense of déjà vu overcame him as he, once again, rubbed tears from his eyes with Mary Jane’s arms around him. As nice as the latter was, he hoped the former wouldn’t become a common occurrence.

“You okay, Pete?”

With a nod, he let out a tired huff of a laugh. “Yeah. Peachy.”

She cupped his cheek in her hand, reached up and kissed his forehead. “You will be.”

Oh, that was nice. Her hand was gentle, and, as pitiful as it might be, he hadn’t had much physical affection since they had broken up, other than May, and, well...he wasn’t going to think about that.

Compared to his laugh, the smile that formed on his face as he looked at her was entirely genuine. 

As MJ looked back at him (and he was so  _ cute _ ), the last six months and fight that had come before really didn’t matter anymore.

Already so close, it only made sense that their faces, their lips, got closer, closer, closer as well, until the space was no longer there.

Peter knew that eventually, he would have to go back downstairs, and that all of those bad feelings would be front and center once more, but for now, for just this moment, as he kissed this wonderful woman, it wasn’t entirely impossible to believe that things actually would be okay again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kissing girls might not solve everything, but it sure does help.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna make chapter two (which is a mostly unrelated idea that I figured I would just stick together) as soft as I CAN.  
> In the meantime, find me on twitter @samamandriel!!


End file.
